The Urge for Going

ABT's Cassandra Trenary Takes a Leap

Cassandra Trenary in Kenneth MacMillan’s “Romeo and Juliet,” by Rosalie O’Connor

It is a season of beginnings and endings for Cassandra Trenary. On June 18, she will have her début in the lead role in Wayne McGregor’s Woolf Works at the Metropolitan Opera House. About a week later, on June 26, she will perform her final Giselle with American Ballet Theatre, partnered by her ABT colleague and close friend James Whiteside. This will be followed by her final performances in Christopher Wheeldon’s The Winter’s Tale (July 2 mat & July 5 eve). She’s not retiring—banish the thought—but this is her last season with American Ballet Theatre, which she joined in 2011 after two years at the company’s affiliated ballet academy, the Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis School. Which is to say that Trenary, who turns 32 this year, has spent her entire adult life, and then some, in the same place, surrounded by many of the same dancers, repertory directors, pianists, physical therapists, and friends. She is admired and well loved by her colleagues. She is also a dancer of great integrity and seriousness, one who has made her mark in a long list of ballets, from Alexei Ratmansky’s historically-inspired Sleeping Beauty, in which she was a particularly touching Aurora, to her headstrong Juliet and committed interpretation of Giselle, in which the audience could clearly see the character’s desperate hunger for happiness in every glance and gesture.

Still, as she told me in the conversation that follows, Trenary recently started to feel that it was perhaps time to go off and try new things while she was still in her prime. As she eloquently puts it, “As a professional dancer, you're always wrestling with time.” So she has taken a leap of faith, and, in the fall, will be joining the Vienna State Ballet, where many interesting changes are afoot under the new leadership of Alessandra Ferri.

We spoke a few weeks back.

Marina: How did you come to the decision that it was time to go?

Cassie: I've always been a curious and exploratory person and artist, and I think this move is really an extension of that need. Like you said, I've been here my entire life. Not just ABT but New York. It has sculpted me into this person who wants to experience everything and try everything and find different ways of expressing myself. But also, when I was injured last season and had to miss performing Romeo and Juliet and Like Water for Chocolate, I felt so crushed, and I asked myself, “Why does this feel so devastating?” I think it was a moment to reflect on the amount of time I have left. As a professional athlete, a professional dancer, you're always wrestling with time. And I thought to myself, there are all these things I want to try to accomplish. If I’m healthy, maybe I have a good eight years in front of me, hopefully longer, but who knows. I was confronted with that and the fact that I want to be on stage as much as possible.

In one way you’re sort of an “ABT baby”—you know everyone there, everyone loves you. You grew up artistically there. But at the same time, I’ve sensed a restlessness in you for a while…

It’s so true. I found myself wondering what life would be like beyond ABT, but also not feeling like there was an opportunity in front of me that felt right, for whatever reason. I could have pursued it, I could have made the asks. But I kept feeling in my gut, “Just be patient. Collect all the knowledge that you can and just do your work.” There were so many fulfilling moments: amazing choreographers coming in, finally getting to perform Romeo and Juliet. But then last year I spent some time with Alessandra Ferri in the studio rehearsing the role of Sally, and enjoyed every second of that and of being onstage with her. And I got to watch her coach Juliet. Something broke open inside of me.

Trenary in “Giselle.” Photo by Rosalie O’Connor.

What were your thoughts at that point?

I thought to myself, “My goal is to perform more.” ABT has a lot of principal dancers, and we just don't have enough shows. So I wanted to put out some feelers and see if I could dance more ballets away from ABT, and perhaps have a presence outside of the US. Being injured was devastating, but I was also feeling very stuck.

What kind of injury did you have?

I fractured my rib in Woolf Works. Nothing out of the ordinary took place. It was during Act II. It was during a lift that I'd done a million times. For whatever reason, my rib had had enough of it, and the cartilage and the bone separated. They call that a fracture. I remember feeling an intense pop and kind of losing function in my torso, but the adrenaline was so intense that I just kept going, while also trying to assess what had happened. I was observing myself as I was dancing and trying to compensate by doing more with my arms and my head. And then I got off stage and I just crumbled.

What was the psychological effect of that?

It really got me thinking. When it became clear that I would not be able to do my performances of Juliet and Like Water for Chocolate, I thought to myself, “it might be time to go somewhere where I can try different things.” It was kind of like when I left Georgia [where she grew up] to pursue dancing. It was scary, and there was so much unknown, but I was following something that I was passionate about. I remember approaching it with so much more excitement and joy at that age.

As you get older, the decision process becomes more conscious, more considered.

I think there's this sense of, okay, I’m 31 now, and I know who I am. I have my identity. I don't actually know what the future holds, but I do know that in the next year, I'll get to dance this, this, this, this, and this. I'll get to experience Europe and have a whole new community. It’s going to be hard, and I'm going to have to figure some things out, and it's going to be confusing, but it’s also important to experience that.

How did you approach Ferri?

I was in those rehearsals watching Alessandra work with Bella on Juliet. Everything she was saying reminded me of all my conversations with Lynn Seymour [with whom she worked on the role of Juliet before her début], about prioritizing bringing life to the stage and to the character. Just being in that room, something started to speak to me. I wanted to find a way to work with Alessandra more. My first conversation with her was me telling her that I love the way she works and that I wanted to find time to get in the studio once I was healthy. There was no intention of asking for a job, but perhaps, I thought, it might be possible to ask her if she might ever consider having me as a guest artist. And she said, “Would you be willing to pick up and move? Because I’m interested in creating something.” And that was the moment I asked myself, “Would I? Would I pick up and move?”

What were your first performances when you came back from your injury?

I did State of Darkness with Molissa [Fenley].

I saw you in that at Fall for Dance last year, and it was a very striking performance, quite different from when you first danced it.

I’ve now spent about five years on it with Molissa. And every time we've revisited it, I think what she's done is distill it to its essence. To tell you the truth, I think it will be a lifelong journey. I don't think I've ever felt that vulnerable onstage, or in such a state of flow. I was completely unaware that I was performing. I would exit the stage and not really know what just happened.

With Molissa Fenley after “State of Darkness.” Photo by Trenary’s mother.

Do you know yet what you will be dancing in Vienna?

I can’t really say, but I’ll definitely be in Alexei Ratmansky’s Kallirhoe [the new title for his Of Love and Rage, which premiered at ABT in 2020], and Giselle.

Do you have a sense about whether you’ll be dancing a lot of classical ballets? Because that has not always been the case with ABT, though you’ve done Ratmansky’s Sleeping Beauty and Giselle.

I will be doing a lot of classical rep, and there’s also Balanchine and Ashton on the program. It’ll be nice to have those familiar things to cling to in a place that will be so unfamiliar to me.

Trenary in Ratmansky’s “The Sleeping Beauty.” Photo by Gene Schiavone.

It sounds like you’ll be dancing a lot, which I’m sure was a huge part of your decision.

It really was. I’ve really leaned on having so many outside projects, but to continue to feed myself under one roof will probably be healthy for me for a while.

Because at ABT, not only are there not enough performances, but in a way I feel like you haven’t had access to the full repertory. Has that been a frustration?

Definitely. And also, I think everything kind of organizes itself in the way it's supposed to. Meaning, if I had been doing everything I wanted at ABT I wouldn’t have had the drive to satisfy this desire I already had to explore beyond it. I am thought of as the artist who takes on the dramatic and contemporary roles. And I love that. And I also crave dancing all of the classics. It has been a source of frustration, and also I'm at peace with it.

I often hear from frustrated dancers, and I wonder, why don’t more dancers leave where they are and try to find a place at another company where they might have more opportunities.

I mean, it’s really hard to change companies. But also, I think a lot of folks stay where they're maybe not the most fulfilled because that feeling becomes a familiar feeling. Even if they want to try something new, there is that fear. I totally get it, and I'm also afraid, but I’m also at peace. The second I made this decision there was this overwhelming sense of relief. I hope that this move encourages people to remind themselves that there's so much out there.

Preparing with Isabella Boylston for “Romeo and Juliet.” Photo by James Whiteside.

What aspects of working in Europe are you curious about?

The lifestyle is going to be different. Everybody talks about the work-life balance. I think New York is such a city of hustlers. I mean, we are so restless, constantly trying to figure out what the next thing is. When I visited Vienna in December I remember thinking, the city is so quiet. Am I gonna be okay here? If there's no garbage on the street, do I want it? I know that there may be a minute where I might be a little bit lonely and a little bit restless and maybe a little bored. But I'm also curious about having that experience, because I can't remember the last time I felt that way. There is also so much art that I want to explore. When I visited in December, there was a Chagall exhibition, and it was absolutely extraordinary. I'm curious about how this is going to inform my own creativity. I'm excited to dance with new people. I’m excited to have healthcare provided by the state. And I’ll be so close to so many other cities. My friends who live abroad tell me that every weekend they travel somewhere to see dance. There’s just so much access. We live in our little New York bubble. There’s so much great stuff happening here, and everybody kind of has their eyes on New York, but there's a whole wealth of art being created that I don’t know anything about. My friends mention choreographers I’ve never heard of.

It sounds like Ferri is putting together quite a group of dancers in Vienna, from all over. It’s almost like being part of a startup.

It feels like that. People are really excited about what she's going to do, and I feel very honored to be a part of that, part of something new, not just a new chapter for me, but a new chapter for this company, and a new chapter for her. And I’m excited that Marcelo Gomes will also be there as Ballet Master, and that Julio Bocca will be teaching.

It’s the ABT extended family!

It really feels like it, and that was so incredibly comforting as I was making this decision. It still feels very within the family.

One of the first things you’ll be dancing in is Kallirhoe, the newly-renamed version of Of Love and Rage, a ballet that originally premiered at ABT back in 2020. You will be reunited with the choreographer Alexei Ratmansky, whom you worked so much with when he was choreographer in residence at ABT. Are you looking forward to working together again?

Nobody else works like him, not really. Well, except for Molissa Fenley and Twyla. There are these creatives who come in and have such a strong point of view, and who get things out of dancers that they never felt they could have found on their own. He has been such an intense influence on my career in such a positive way, and was always a champion of mine. I missed that attention to intention and to detail, and that attention—as frustrating as it can feel sometimes—to not being able to get away with anything. While also knowing that I can trust him, because I know that what he's asking for will look better. I'm curious to approach his work with the facility I have now and the mind I have now.

What do you feel have been some of your milestone roles at ABT?

I think Sleeping Beauty, Giselle, and Juliet. Those were profound moments for me. Beauty was my first full length, Giselle was the first ballet I danced coming back from COVID and as a principal dancer. And Juliet was a ballet I had waited so long to make my debut in. I had put so much work and research and myself into it. And getting to dance it with Herman Cornejo, and share the stage with an artist of his caliber was the greatest gift.

As Raskolnikov in Helen Pickett’s “Crime and Punishment.” Photo by Emma Zordan.

How about the role of Raskolnikov in Crime and Punishment, which was created on you by Helen Pickett?

I think what was really cool about it was that there was so much freedom, which at times was really challenging for me. We approached it as if it were a play. There was a script before there was movement vocabulary. And that was really challenging, because I found myself knowing exactly what my intentions were, without knowing the steps. And then then at one point, I just kind of let that go. And I eventually got around to feeling confident with the vocabulary that had been given to me. Maybe this is where State of Darkness comes in a little bit, in that I was able to allow myself to be vulnerable.

You got to perform it again at Kennedy Center earlier this year.

When we performed it at the Kennedy Center in February, we had just found out that Trump had taken over the Center. Being there felt emotionally charged. Stepping on that stage to perform a role that's usually performed by a man felt very much like a protest, and very empowering. It allowed me to lean into anger and into being deeply upset and sensitive to injustice. And I was able to lean into what it’s like to feel profound shame and guilt. It was cool to have that experience onstage.

You recently had a show of your photographs at PRIV.Y gallery on the Lower East Side. Tell me a bit about your photography, a lot of which consists of these very intimate, very open, unvarnished images of life behind the stage. What kind of camera do you use?

I have a Nikon F. This particular model was created in 1959. And I’ve been photographing the company with it since 2018. I just kind of became addicted to it. There's something so humbling about shooting on film. When a moment turns out the way you'd hoped it feels like the greatest gift. I think it's been a way for me to take my mind off of myself. It feels therapeutic because it forces me to focus on what's in front of me and not what I'm going through. So anytime I feel like I need to slow my mind down, for example when I was injured last season, I pick up the camera. I wanted to be in the theater, but it was hard to be there and not be able to dance. So I would knock on people's doors and ask if I could photograph them while they were getting ready. It was a way to explore and play, and for us to have these moments for ourselves. We didn’t know it at the time, but I photographed Stella Abrera preparing for her final Giselle at the Kennedy Center in 2020. I photographed Gillian Murphy as she prepared for her final Juliet. Lots of debuts, but also lots of moments of disappointment and relief; lots of moments from when I was a soloist and I shared the dressing room with so many ladies, and we would just blow off steam. But really, I got the courage to show my work because I knew I was leaving. It had been a secret dream of mine to share my photographs. Once I knew I was leaving, I thought, “What are the things I want to accomplish before I go?” And that was a really big one.

Photo of Skylar Brandt by Cassandra Trenary.

What are your thoughts as you head into this last season with ABT?

I want to soak up every moment I have with my partners, with my friends, and to appreciate even the challenging moments. It feels like I'm approaching every day with a sense of reverence for the passage of this time. My goal is to be as true to myself as I can. And to trust myself. I think there's a freedom that comes with making a decision like this. If I’m being honest, I feel a sense of calm.

The dancer-photographer. Photo by Isabella Boylston.